New beginnings

Welcome to my brand new shiny blog!

I am here because I am about to start my first attempt at IVF and I have lots of thoughts and feelings that, try as they might, my friends and family don’t understand. I need this to be somewhere that I can blow off some IVF-related steam in the hope that I can then talk about something else with my poor, long-suffering husband.

I have spent the last 2 years being tested for everything under the sun and the current theory is that I have mild PCOS and, although I do ovulate, I do so “inadequately” which leaves me with low progesterone levels. My husband’s sperm are few and far between, deformed and lazy. So basically, either of us would struggle to conceive on our own and yet we attracted each other like a pair of fertilically-challenged magnets.

I have spent at least a year googling all sorts of things that I shouldn’t have in a desperate search for justifaction that the way that I am feeling is ok. I kept reading blogs written by these smart, funny ladies who were feeling what I was feeling. I have finally taken the leap to join this community of brave, fierce ladies who can laugh in the face of adversity and keep on fighting.

Come, join me! x

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7 Comments

Filed under The countdown to IVF #1

7 responses to “New beginnings

  1. Ha! I asked my husband if infertiles attract, because in our case, we certainly did as well!

    I’m not quite sure what my problem is, besides irregular periods, and a fairly low AMH level (and that’s literally the only testing they’ve done). For whatever reason the RE doesn’t seem too concerned about it. Maybe the IVF drugs are so strong he assumes they might just fix the problem.

    My husband’s swimmers are deformed, lazy, and cross-eyed! And there’s like 4 of them. HCG injections made his numbers go DOWN, so that was lovely. Did your husband’s urologist seem clueless to you? I never felt confident in his ability to improve the situation. I also noticed that you said in your other post that he was re-tested after 10 weeks. Ours had us re-test after 4 months of injections. There doesn’t seem to be any consistent standard in MFI treatment and testing/re-testing from what I’ve seen around here.

    When does your cycle start?!

    • I went through a phase of thinking that maybe we found each other because we weren’t meant to have kids… then I thought screw that, gimmie some needles, i’mma get me a baby!!

      I’m in the UK which is a blessing and a curse. The blessing is that healthcare is free and I get 3 free shots at IVF.

      The curse is that this means there are waiting lists and incompetent doctors. No one cares about success rates as you have to go to your local IVF hospital unless you pay to go privately so in order to keep costs down they have a “one size fits all” type approach to fertility treatment. We don’t really have urologists, or at least we don’t for fertility investigations. They told my husband to stop drinking & if he smoked he would have had to stop that too. That was the end of the investigations and we were referred straight to ICSI. I think he has a variocele but the docs don’t care.

      I have my co-ordination appt on 9th August and I can start the next cycle after that so I anticipate around 20th August I’ll be ready to go. I’m trying not to overthink this but I have been put on the short protocol which means there will be no down regulation stage. I think that means I have low AMH, but they don’t test that in the UK either.

      p.s. I’m on day 5 of spotting and day 22 of my cycle, it really is a drag isn’t it?! x

  2. Oy. I feel ya. Your cycle sounds JUST like mine.

    Well I’m pretty jealous of the 3 free IVF’s, but the downside kinda sounds awful! Waiting is simply the worst. And the ‘one size fit’s all’ approach can’t be good. I hope they don’t include female infertility into that whole philosophy, because there are so many different issues and treatment options for female issues.

    Over here as soon as our SA results came back low, my RE said we were on hiatus until we saw a urologist. I quickly realized that urologist’s might be great doctors for other issues, but infertility is NOT their specialty. He even admitted that MFI is decades behind women’s infertility, because for so many years doctors just assumed it was a female problem. Nice.

    So they did basic lab work on his hormones, which came back WNL, and he eventually had an ultrasound to determine if he had another varicocele. He didn’t, so surgery wasn’t necessary, and since his FSH levels weren’t too high, they thought he might benefit from HCG. That didn’t work.

    I have to say, I was relieved he didn’t have to have surgery. The urologist told us flat out that it may or may not help, and it would have only meant a much longer wait, 6 months of recovery, etc. And hormones/drugs to boost male fertility is a shot in the dark, from my experience.

    So as troubling as it might be if you think your husband does have a varicocele and they’re not doing anything about it, I’d just be happy to be moving on to IVF. A surgery wouldn’t guarantee anything. ICSI seems to be the only known treatment to overcome MFI that has real results.

    Ok I’ll get off my soapbox now! 🙂

    PS- if you’re on the short protocol you might catch right up with me, or be ahead of me. That mean’s no Lupron?

    • Yes I certainly don’t take the 3 free attempts for granted – even in the UK that’s good – some parts of the UK only get 1 or 2 attempts, it just depends on where you live.

      Yeah the short protocol is awesome in that I don’t have to inject myself anywhere near as much and it will all be over with so much quicker but I am nervous that I will actually ovulate on my own or it just won’t work. I am generally just really freaking nervous!!

      When do you start injecting?

      • I start Lupron on August 6, and I think Follistim etc on the 17th. Tentative retrieval is the week of August 27. I wonder how we’ll line up!
        So they said you’re on short protocol because of low amh? Or you’re not sure?

      • I think it could be a close one! I really don’t know. I had my initial appt and the consultant took a couple of details & weighed me (we only get it free if we’re within their recommended weight and age range). The next step was me booking my co ordination appt & when I booked that the receptionist told me that i had been put on the short protocol. I have to wait until 9th to find out why but I’m guessing it must be low AMH. Although I don’t think that’s been tested. I’m tired of guessing!! I can’t wait for this appt to be over with so that I have some proper information to plan with. I am also kind of excited to start in a weird way!!

  3. So they made that call based on previous hormone testing maybe? It will be a huge relief to get answers, I’m sure!

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